Holding on to my Baby

We went from this...

to this...

Our precious E broke his femur and is now in a spica cast. This means he has a cast on his left leg, his torso and half of his right. Of course, I have had every emotion a mommy can have. Guilt, anxiety, sadness, fear, joy (when they said no surgery and when my baby recognized me after anesthesia). This is the first time I have had to truly let one of my babies go. I had to watch the doctors roll E away and I could not hold his hand, I could not sit next to him and I could not make it better on my own. The Lord is teaching me that my boys are in His arms. I can let go and know that they are being protected by the ultimate healer. This is not going to be easy. Life will be very complicated, but I chose to find peace in it all. Peace in the fact that I get to hold my baby again. All moms know that a 2 year old does not want to be held for long. E is one of those boys that is always on the go, usually chasing after his big brother. So, for this 6 week time frame, I can slow down a little, hold my E, read hundreds of books, watch a few extra movies, play games and watch a big brother become a true helper and friend. Maybe God is preparing all of us for our third little miracle. Funny way of preparing us, but I'll take God's will over mine, any day.